OOPS! I TRIATHALONED AGAIN

Well, it's been a little over a week 

and I haven't died of

residual effects from the

2016 MALIBU TRIATHALON.

You'd think I'd have keeled over

after having to get up at 

2:30 A freaking M

to drive down to Zuma Beach with my

sooper-powered neighbor

Darren Turbow.

But we weren't the only ones:

I got marked up

with my bib number

(in case you die and they need to identify you)

And then got my gear set up in the transition area.

It turned out to be a misty day,

which was delightful since the last two years

were stoopid hair dryer in your face hot.

After a beautiful performance of the National Anthem by Rachel Platten,

(and a moving rendition of her hit, The Fight Song)

it was time to go!

And after all was said and done,

I thought I had a really great race!

I knew my swim wasn't as good as last years.

The mist made it hard to keep your bearings and I 

had to stop alot to make sure I was on course.

But I thought I 

MURDERED

it on the bike and run.

I ended up going 

two hours, 10 minutes,

which seemed

AWESOME!

Then I realized I did a 

2:07 last year.

Oops.

Still--

I'll take it.

I mean,

I tied my personal record of 

NOT DYING,

right?

Here are the official times:

I was a minute over on my bike

and a minute under on my run.

The extra time came on my swim.

But next year I'll beat that

2:07.

If I don't die, that is.

Thanks,

Malibu Triathalon!

THE 2015 NAUTICA MALIBU TRIATHALON

What is the estimated f-----g 

idiotic self-imposed nightmare 

completion time of this event?

That's the text I received at 4:30am

from a sooper friend

who was very upset with me for

doing a dumb triathalon instead of attending the

Ottawa International Animation Festival

(where it was NOT 4:30am)

And it 

WAS

dumb.

I had to get up at 3:45am to go

SWIM 1/2 A MILE IN THE OCEAN

BIKE ALONG THE COAST FOR 18 MILES

and

RUN FOR 4 MILES ALONGSIDE ZUMA BEACH

And for 

WHAT?!

It's not like they were giving away 

free Pokemon cards after you were done.

But it

WAS

beautiful at that hour:

For those of you that keep up on 

warburtonlabs facts,

last year was the first time I

tried the triathlon.

And it was sooper hard!

I was especially disappointed with my swim.

I just wasn't ready for the madness of it.

(I've likened it to the opening sequence of

Saving Private Ryan... only with more swim caps)

But this year I was intent 

on beating the ocean!

So I got myself checked in

along with my neighbor-in-crime,

Darren.

I got marked up

(so nice of them to give me the year I was born)

I set up my transition area,

where you keep your gear

 inbetween events:

And then it was time to go!

And you know what?

I done good!

Where last year I finished in

two hours and 21 minutes,

this year I did it in 

2:07!

The last mile of the run was the worst!

So hot!

So tired!

(So dumb!)

I mentioned it in last year's post,

but my absolute favorite thing

about the event is the people.

EVERYONE IS THERE!

Women.

Men.

Young.

Old.

Older still.

Fat.

Skinny.

Fit.

Flabby.

People kicking their disabilities to the curb.

EVERYONE

is there to challenge themselves.

And that's cool.

So will I do it

again?

I dunno.

But I just might be dumb enough to.